It always depends on what you are aiming to protect, and what the thread scenario is.
If only you use a service, you should put it behind a VPN, as “securing” your own tools (lets say gitlab for example) and so on is useless if you can just put it behind VPN.
Most websites these days set this google captcha terror to maximum setting for no reason what so ever, which just decreases usability of the site.
SSLlabs is a good start but only the very tip of the iceberg. If you run a wordpress with 20.000 weird plugins that are exploitable from the internet, a good SSLlabs score doesn’t help you much.
SSL in general assumes you have a MITM attack, which is more of a government thing. If you are up against a government that game has been lost about 10-15 years ago and you might just use a less restrictive SSL configuration so “everyone” of your users can use it, also those with windows 2000-something.
resource-hungry
Human ressource or CPU? Personally I’m not a big fan of stuff like WAF’s - just use well written open source code. Thats much more secure than putting a WAF in front of the some forum or wordpress.
Honestly, just deal with it. Is your data really that worth protecting? Or is security just a hobby? If its just a hobby enjoy it, but don’t take it to seriously. There is no (real world) downside to being hacked. So your server will send out emails to ask people to install spyware or buy bitcoin from elon musk or whatever. Thats ok. Deal with it 
The only thing you really have to do to stay secure enough to pretty much never have problems is:
- install stable software
- use only open source software
- don’t use all this microsoft nonsense
- always ALWAYS patch your software right away
- on your servers, dont expose ports to public that dont need to (no 0.0.0.0:3306, make that listen to 127.0.0.1)
99.9% of “hacks” exploit well known CVEs with completely automated scanning of the internet, or fully automated malware campaigns with emails. 0.1% of hacks are targeted and the rest is government wise, which you cant do anything against anways.
Use reasonable security (the list I wrote above) and just forget about it, and if something happens just relax and fix it.